"A fool always loses his temper,But a wise man holds it back."
- Proverbs 29:11
Sometimes we call it being grumpy. Sometimes I admit that I've lost my temper. Voice raised, tone ugly, cadence impatient. I hate it as soon as it comes out of me.
If a fool looses his temper, then I am the queen of fools. This is not who I want to be. This is not how I want to parent, teach, speak ... do anything.
"Momma I'm sorry you lost your temperatures."
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She was really mad, then she wasn't but it was during the "Phelps face" thing and I asked her to do it again |
Sweet Shelby. She pulls me out of that white hot angry place in a heartbeat. I do lose my temperature. The heat goes up, out of control, but there's the danger of hearts turning cold.
"He who is slow to anger has great understanding,But he who is quick-tempered exalts folly."
- Proverbs 14:29
It is better than it used to be, but I am no finished product of God's refining fires. Day by day, moment by moment, each "deafness of defiance" where Shelby pretends not to hear me when I know full well she could hear the cellophane crinkle of a wrapper or bag from across the house ... I have to stop everything and call on God to still my tongue. Bless my heart and shut my mouth.
"He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty,And he who rules his spirit, than the who captures a city."
- Proverbs 16:32
So it isn't by might that I can cool my heels. It isn't by fortitude or strength that I can crank down the thermostat. Only by the refreshing of my spirit, by giving God control and admitting I don't have control can I reign in the redheadedness.
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What do you mean, stop taking Shelby's goldfish? |
I could hem and haw and say that when I lose my temper is when they finally start listening. But I don't want to parent them under an iron will of fear. I could call it "righteous indignation" but I'm coming to understand that is an attribute solely belonging to the Lord.
"... for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God."
- James 1:20
I try to be quick to apologize to my girls, but I need to "keep my temperatures." Shelby has a disarming personality like her daddy ... but Victoria takes after her momma. Passions run high and will only get higher. So when defiance stares me in the face and dares me to lose my mind, I need to give it to God. Before I alienate these children from myself, and possibly Him, in the flames.
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She really didn't want her dirty diaper changed. Really. Mom you're unreasonable. |
"And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
- Philippians 4:7
Hey Amanda! Found your blog on compel- I am a compel member also. I love the "losing your temperatures"- so cute- I feel like I'm going to remember that next time I get angry! haha. I also love how you add many photos to your posts. I have yet to start my blog, but think that's a sweet touch. Blessings!
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