Friday, September 18, 2015

My Hope for You, Shelby

This morning was glorious.

It started out pretty good - I was able to do my Bible study, muddle through a workout, and get ready for the day before anyone got up.

But that's just good. What happened next was so much more important.

Victoria was up first, and we were just hanging out for a few minutes on the couch while she shook off the lingering sleepiness and really woke up. Seeing big sister usually perks her right up. We heard Shelby stirring ... some typical, relatively happy mumblings were coming from her bedroom. Yet she didn't come out.

Then she sounded less than happy. She wasn't crying, but she sounded more like she does when someone has to wake her up. She might as well be 16 already in that regard. Trust me when I say that you do not want to have to wake that curly head up.

So sweet and innocent - just caught her like this yesterday - a rare moment
Hoping she wasn't sick, Tori and I made our way back to her room. When I started to open her door I found her just on the other side. She was staring intently into the mirror we mounted on the wall so she wouldn't climb on her dresser to look at her clothes every day.

Her eyes met mine, round with questions, and she said "I want God to take care of me, but He feels far away."

Moms. What do you say? Drawing my spiritual bow I quickly tossed up what had to be the most desperate and pleading arrow prayer heaven has ever received. (Ok, probably not but it felt like it at the time - this is my most important assignment!).

It made me SO happy to hear her say that, but at the same time I felt like I needed King Solomon-strength wisdom. Would the wrong words at this crucial time make her feel like God isn't there? Can't be trusted? Doesn't exist?

Praise Him, it is doubtful this is the only conversation she and I will have about the presence of God. My note to rally the troops of heaven could only be answered with the sword already at my disposal. The sword of truth.

Page 48 of The Best Yes Study Guide (Lysa TerKeurst)
Truth greater than facts. Greater than our feelings. I had just underline a statement attesting that in Bible study yesterday! Shelby was feeling that God was far away, and any scientist might reasonably argue that God's presence was not something quantifiable there in her doorway this morning. But the Biblical truth, the sword I had to slay that lie that He is far away is stronger.


Throughout the morning she has spoken of God. She wanted to give Him a hug. I tried to explain that the only time He had a body like ours was when Jesus came and died for our sins.

She wanted Him to join us for breakfast, so we prayed for His presence even if that didn't mean sitting down and eating. I told her that Jesus broke bread with the disciples and I bet that when we join God forever one day He will probably eat with us.

Later  she said she had looked everywhere for God but that she couldn't find Him. Oh my sweet Shelby Hope. My one hope for you is that you find Him! I told her to never stop looking, because He has promised that she will find Him.


My one prayer, my most important plea, my sweet girls is that you seek and find the Lord. My soul is soaring to unprecedented heights and trembling in awe of what is unfolding before me. Lord please help me guide her to keep looking for You. My greatest joy is for both my girls to find You!

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